windy night

 

it's getting late & i'm sitting up watching a movie.. Roman Holiday .. i'm really not one for romance movies, but -  ah, i'm a sucker for Gregory Peck.. and Audrey Hepburn is easy on the eyes too.. & i suppose it isn't the happy ending type of romance movies, the guy doesn't get the girl in the end..

it's a windy night here, so very windy.. so much so that my house creaks & groans.. sometimes i can feel the air create a vacuum inside.. i am surrounded by trees, i suppose that is what makes the wind sound louder.. wind sounds different on flat land.. it sounds different no matter what it is passing thru & over & around.. i wonder if most people consider this? wind in the city, has a different sound, as it whirls around the sharp corners of large buildings.. it sounds different as it creates waves on the ocean.. i respect the wind.. it always demands my attention.. here we have a hill that is just pines & the wind thru pines is a sound that is so distinct & haunting.. the maples bend & the oaks creak & aspens have a bit of a whistle.. anyway, this isn't meant to be a lesson on wind.. it is just so loud & gusting.. like it demands a bit of recognition.. [so granted]

we had a bit of thunder too.. thunder on the last day of November.. seems a bit odd for upstate New York.. but i find i'm not surprised by the odd weather patterns anymore.. what with climate change & global warming.. out of place & unexpected weather is becoming a norm.. ah, don't get me started.. 

i suppose i should shut this down & get myself tucked into bed next to the fella & my ava-kitty.. i'm always awake before the skies turn light.. my old black & white movie is over now.. so g'nite ya'll..

growing as an artist

 

i have had a bit of a creative revelation.. all my life, since i was old enough to hold a crayon, i have drawn.. i thought that being an artist was perfecting that talent of reproduction.. well, over the years.. i feel i have achieved that.. 2 years ago, i began to dabble in watercolour painting.. i've always loved it, but felt intimidated by it.. so i spent some time learning different techniques.. i would save all the paintings i envied, so i could learn from them.. only knowing what i know, i attempted to reproduce them.. it was how i taught myself to paint in watercolour.. so i have a stack of paintings.. attempting so many different styles, papers, techniques.. 

and now? well.. i'm bored

i've been feeling the urge to find my true authentic.. regarding art, this means to find my own style.. how would i paint a picture without any reference art? to create something without it being a reproduction or copy..

i love to challenge myself.. so from here on out, i will not copy another persons art.. it was great for learning, but now i need to grow, not just as an artist, but as my own artist.. 

watercolour & ink rhino, created by me.. 

keep on the sunny side of life

short story - back in early March, my sister L sent me a photo taken by one of her friends.. he took a photo of his mother on a subway.. the oncoming trains lights centered perfectly in the eyes of his mothers reflection in the glass.. it's an amazing photo.. and i found myself deeply moved by it.. the woman in the photo had such a defeated energy about her.. i needed to know her name.. i called my sis up and she relayed the info she learned from her son [the photographer].. she took the reflection as an omen, like a demon within her.. she was of failing health & the prognosis was grim.. 

my intuition & insight was strong.. i felt tapped into her thru that photo and i began to just speak of what i was seeing & feeling.. 

the only demon she carries is one of defeat.. she has an illness & she wore that illness like a mask.. it owned her, she was so far hidden behind it that the mask became her only identity.. every time she looked in the mirror & saw a victim, she fed that negative energy.. dis-ease feeds upon negative energy.. she needed to cut the life line on that illness.. how? by clamping off that energy.. how to do that? by replacing it with positive energy.. fill that same space with love, comfort, joy, happiness.. dis-ease can't live in a space so full of light..  start with looking in the mirror and loving yourself.. thank your body and your cells for how healthy they are.. for how divinely healthy they are.. 

being healthy is a choice.. choose to be happy.. it starts with self love.. change the energy so that dis-ease is choked off.. it gives it an environment it simply cannot live in.. 

as i was talking to her, i didn't realize she had me on speaker phone & her son was listening.. would i have been able to be as unabashedly candid had i known someone else was listening? 

i had printed out that photo, back in March.. and a couple days ago, i was shuffling thru some papers on my desk & this photo jumped out.. i spent a few moments looking at her, wondering about her.. 

the next day, my sister calls "do you remember that photo of the lady .. etc"  of course i do.. well, she is having a happy Thanksgiving with her family.. she is well enough to do some of the cooking.. she was relayed my words and took them to heart.. 

and she is now thriving.. 

what am i thankful for? that the perfect chain of events lead for our paths to cross..

always trust your intuition.. and never doubt the power of positive thinking/feeling.. 

birthday blessings

it has been a beautiful day.. i don't celebrate my birthday, but try telling that to people that love you.. i keep my circle small.. i can literally count them on one hand.. and each one of them shared time & space with me in some way today.. i am blessed.. since i don't know my kitty Avas birthday, i honour her on my own birthday.. i make it special for her.. she got snuggle time in the sun with me on the bed, she got treats, she got a shelf put up on the bedroom window so she can have a bird watching perch.. which i benefit from too.. i stretched my hand out with some peanuts on it and was immediately surprised by a chickadee & a tufted titmouse landing on my palm.. 

just now, i heard a ruckus outside, so i opened the window & shined my flashlight out & there is a chubby, fluffy raccoon hanging on the gate door, trying to noisily figure out how to get to the window sill where he can smell the little bit of cereal that the birds & squirrels didn't finish up.. so i tossed him a handful of dry cat food.. he is crunching away while the fella & i talk to him.. my flashlight catches the eyes of a deer bedded down & trying to sleep for the night in the shallow under the pine tree.. 

i love my life.. the things that most people probably overlook & not even notice, are the little miracles that show me just how blessed i am.. 

my creative nook

 

so we have this secretary desk.. it was always the fellas domain.. i am always looking for a space to call my own.. now, we live in a tiny log cabin that isn't even 750 square feet.. i guess they call it cozy, but it is small.. which is okay.. it's still bigger than the house i grew up in.. and that was a 6 person family.. here it is just the 2 of us, plus my Ava kitty.. we don't have a usable basement, no attic.. so juggling living space with storage space gets creative..  anyway, that is just me setting the scene a little.. my art stuff if scattered all about.. in boxes, under the bed, cupboards, on the dresser etc.. well, the fella surprised me by saying that if i wanted to clean his stuff out, that i could have this desk for my creative nook.. 

i am so excited.. i've been an artistic soul my whole life, so i have an enormous amount of "stuff".. but this area holds all my mixed media.. all organized.. i sooo love it.. my little nook..  my other space that is cherished is my book shelf.. art & books = my passion..

my inner child is giggling & spinning circles in the front yard with her eyes closed

my backyard this morning

the full moon is today which always brings on a wordy mood.. last nights insomnia & restless legs were awful.. it truly should be called restless body syndrome.. it feels like there is static electricity amped up inside my veins & it needs to come out.. i try to force my body to be still & it's a bizarre thing.. my toes actually twist of their own accord.. they move in ways that i can't move my toes on will.. being still is impossible.. from bed to couch to porch.. the moon so bright it amazes me that i can see so much, so far, into my woods.. i could see the 3 deer bedded down sleeping.. so this morning when i woke up, at sunrise, i found them still nestled into the fallen leaves.. photo op! this is last years fawn, i was talking to her.. this brings about such a sense of calm & contentment.. which i need.. full moons can be magical & mysterious.. if only i could quell the almost magnetic sensation inside me.. i can feel small flushes of adrenaline that borders on a hot flash.. tiny muscles twitch.. i am trying to find my zen to push down this suppressed mania..  okay, i gotta shush myself.. try to meditate or something.. 

my foggy woods

some people see a grey, foggy morning.. but i see it as an opportunity to go outside before sunrise & walk into my woods.. to me, it's hauntingly beautiful.. the air is thick & carries sound differently.. it layers itself upon each foot fall of the deer.. my woods are in a bit of a valley and when the pond overflows, it creates a stream that meanders down.. the abundant slate & rocks turn it into a babbling brook.. the dip in elevation & the water - give the fog a hesitation.. the fog lingers till the sun crests the hill & slowly burns off.. my woods are nearly magical..

november influences

i haven't blogged in a long time, at least it feels like a long time.. everyday is a different project.. the fella has gotten into fermenting & i've been helping him with that.. so far the successes have been sauerkraut & cranberries.. [not together] we are always trying something new with food.. we both have very specialized diets, so there is a lot of trial & error figuring out what works for each of us.. right now we are sipping on scratch ginger tea w/ lime & cinnamon.. it's so warming.. 

creatively, my newest project is when i do an oracle card reading, i have been trying to infuse my interpretation into some kind of art.. the above is "the moon".. i love newness.. starting new journals & projects.. i revamped an old art journal.. i like to keep my creations grouped together.. so i have an artbook with just buildings in it, one with only neurographic art, this new one called "oracle card inspiration".. i like to challenge myself.. interpreting a card reading with words is one thing, now to visualize it.. it's fun.. 

stay tuned for whatever November brings my way.. what will November bring you?